As any one of these topics may not necessarily require a full article on it’s own, I’ll keep this page updated as a quick-stop for roleplaying concerns and potential solutions. If you’ve got more, send ’em my way!
The ideal state of being for roleplayers is 80% emotionally invested in a character that is nothing like you. When creating a character, your personal tics should not factor into the character’s design at all. You may hate the idea of swimming in open water but still enjoy playing a pirate.
Come at it from the perspective that you’re an archaeologist, who is uncovering layer after layer of how someone lived. You become emotionally invested so that you can better understand what you’re uncovering. Your personal feelings about their pagan gods just don’t matter in this context. It’s not you! It’s a character and you’re exploring them.
That said, there’s a sliding scale here. You don’t want a character so foreign that you can’t begin to care. You don’t want a character so familiar that you take things personally or don’t learn anything. As you get better at roleplaying, push it out a little further and change deeper details.
It’s OK to do a self-insert exactly one time. It’s a good learning exercise and you’ll better understand the nature of roleplaying when you experience the game without it. However, I would direct you to Roleplaying : A Primer for a better approach to character creation.
It’s also pretty acceptable to self-insert for one playthrough through any video game. It’s fun to see how you’d end up.
The danger comes when it becomes a habit. Many folks get stuck and become incapable of doing anything else. They’ve missed the point of roleplaying. Sadly, they also miss out on all the magic and majesty of discovery through roleplaying.
In most cases, context is sufficient. Simply breaking eye contact to look at the DM and ask a question or referencing some out-of-game thing makes it clear that you are the player speaking. Your allies aren’t stupid and nobody will get confused.
Many players do choose to employ a special voice or accent for their in-character speech. I would not personally recommend doing this unless you already have a good handle on your character. It’s one of those things that can easily become a prison. When in doubt, just raise a hand and say “Out of Character : Can I roll Knowledge to see what I remember?”. Eye contact is your friend!
Firstly, understand that anxiety when roleplaying with close friends is not uncommon. You’re exposing a very personal and semi-serious side of yourself that they may not have previously seen. It is difficult to look your brother in the face, raise an imaginary mug of ale, and sing a Dwarven rock-boat shanty.
To alleviate this, I would recommend the DM have everyone introduce their characters in-character at the start of the game. Let the shy person go second to last. The shy person should have a written-down introduction : “I am Matilda Davenport from the nation of Davenport. I like fairies and my greatest hope is to go on a grand adventure.”
If the anxiety persists across many sessions, it’s a sign that you’re not very comfortable with your group. Spend some time one-on-one with them discussing some creative pursuit. You could show them artwork you’ve done or talk about both your characters’ backstories, team dynamics – whatever you feel slightly uncomfortable giving your opinions on. Time spent alone with a person is what will breed comfort with them. Time spent discussing creative things will breed comfort with expression (roleplaying).
Bonus note for those who have trouble speaking up : Put this person in charge of something specific within the team. Whether it’s formation, supply tracking, initiative tracking, or a scout position. Give them a consistent excuse to be asked and to answer questions from their party members. Over time, we can only hope that they feel more comfortable sharing their other ideas. Anxiety is a bitch, yo.
Obviously, have them read my primer about discovery! But actually, just have a talk during session 0. Talk about what level of roleplay they want. Talk about what level of roleplay they’ve done before. Specifically give them an example scenario and see what depth of roleplay they’re comfortable with accepting at face value. Remind them that “roleplay” is not an excuse to be a dick.
Some groups can handle betrayals. Some groups can’t make it out of the tavern. It’s your job as the DM to run a game tailored to your players. It is not the player’s job to tailor themselves to your game. Very often, you’re just in the wrong group for what you want.
Most important : If you see that the players are failing to cope, change gears and lighten the tone. Far too many “dungeon masters” push their players past the point of fun and then blame their lack of skill. “You should enjoy the crack of my whip” is sadistic nonsense better left at home.
80% of decisions and dialogue should be entirely your character. When you become empathetic rather than sympathetic, it’s time to take a break. Folks who go 100% into their character are very dramatic and don’t get as much out of the experience. Dress up, have a good time, wear a funny hat, talk in an accent, but never cross that line into trying to feel the full weight of killing all those folks. It’s just not worth it.
You are a player playing a game and it’s your job to facilitate that game. If you’re a paladin, don’t bop the thief. Agree to join the party of the other three players in the tavern, for no additional payment. Accept the random mage, who looks a whole lot like the one that just died, into the party with open arms. Agree to help the townspeople, even though they’ve failed to make a strong case.
The character portion comes in after you’ve facilitated the game. You’re on the quest, you’re in the party, you’ve made it through the tutorial. Now, you play through that scenario making decisions and growing as your character.
You don’t steal from your party, because that destroys the game, but you do steal from the townsfolks and deal with the consequences. The line is right there where the game stops being playable or fun for other players.
Voice acting is weird and awkward. It’s also one of the most fun parts of roleplaying! There are groups of professional voice actors. There are groups where nobody voice acts. There are groups where some portion or a single person voice acts and the rest don’t. If you feel drawn to do it, do it.
Doing voices is like any other aspect of roleplaying. It’s exactly the same as gesturing an invisible sword while explaining your sick kill move. It is there as a tool to help everyone establish the same shared visualization of what’s going on.
A Dwarven voice reminds everyone at the table that you’re a Dwarf. They’re not looking at your character sheet or your mini and might even still be calling you Steve rather than Urist McBro. Give ’em a gruff “I’ve boxed donkeys with more kick than this!” and I guarantee you’ll be treated according to your appropriate stature (or gender?).
Furthermore, voices are a wonderful vessel to help you keep your own character’s personality locked in. If she’s normally ditzy but suddenly takes a serious tone, everyone notices – including you. You’re almost guaranteed to carry through with actions that match that serious tone, once you’ve laid it infront of everyone.
Voices communicate body language and tonality that may otherwise be absent. They’re a wonderful tool. They’re also a horrible, horrible red herring that have broken greater men than me.
You see, a voice can become a cop-out for character. You get a great Dwarven voice and it never changes. You enjoy a few moments in the spotlight. Maybe you even hog the spotlight and become a little unbearable. If you spend more time on your voice than your character, you’ll end up as a shallow showboater.
Beware all ye who enter here. Use a voice to deliver your character. Don’t use a voice in place of a character.